Taber Page 7

  She stiffened at the finality in his order. “Get on with it then.”

  “I don’t know what you want from me,” he said.

  “I never wanted anything from you except honesty, Taber.”

  “Is this still about me not telling you I was a god?”

  “That’s part of it, yes. But then adding on the spying and the pure arrogance that it wouldn’t matter. That is the rest of it.”

  He mulled over her words for a moment before kissing her. She held herself rigid in his arms for a few seconds then with a moan of surrender melted into him. He swept his tongue deep into her mouth, touching, tasting and indulging in her unique flavour.

  I’ll fight to keep you, Lainey. The other half of my soul and now that I’ve found you, I’m not giving you up.

  He almost shared that thought with her but kept it to himself at the last moment. She was already jumpy—that may send her into full flight mode. He knew of her thoughts about leaving and dismissed them. He wouldn’t let that happen. Things didn’t seem so bad now that she was in his arms, but he knew that feeling would vanish once the kiss ended.

  Another reason not to let it end. He held her tighter, allowing his hands to roam over her, memorising the shape, her curves—all he could. Eventually he ended the kiss and brushed her hair back as he stared down into her eyes.

  “Okay, Lainey Mercer. You and I are going to talk about this a bit more.”

  “I’m tired, Taber.”

  “You’ll be more tired after. We’re not just going to keep going this way, ignoring what is between us. I owe you an explanation for what I did and you, I want you to tell me why everything I do makes you assume the worst of me. Who hurt you Lainey? So bad to keep you from being able to trust?”

  She narrowed her eyes at him and crossed her arms. “Tell me something first.”

  “Okay.” Anything to keep her talking and willing to stay with him. He had to get her to see and understand what he’d done was out of…wait, love? Out of love for her?

  “Candace told me that you didn’t like Sekhmet because of what she did to your brother. How all she thought about was herself.”

  He nodded. “True. But I fail to see how that matters at this moment.”

  “What you did, Taber, was all about you. We were supposed to be in a relationship and yet your actions were to benefit you. No concern for how I may take them. You were jealous that I would possibly go out with anyone else and followed, then thought about threatening his job. Never once considering that Sean and I were nothing more than friends. It was all about you. All about. So tell me this, Taber Ellis or Khonsu. How is that, any different than Sekhmet and what she did to your brother? Because from where I’m standing, selfishness is selfishness, no matter what your reasoning.”

  Chapter Seven

  Taber stiffened at her words. Realisation dawned that what she said was absolutely true. He had been doing the same thing he had accused Sekhmet of doing for so long to Talios. Since the visit from Sekhmet and the others months ago, he’d come to accept that he’d never understand what Talios had experienced and had agreed to let his animosity for Sekhmet go. Taber stared at Lainey, regret that his actions had caused her so much pain filling him. They had made him come across as selfish when that was so far from his intentions. He opened his mouth to reply but her next statement stilled what he was about to say.

  “I’ve seen what men like you can do to others around them.” Lainey’s fists were clenched. “Justifying what you do to make yourself feel right.”

  She paced away to put some distance between them. The space he could not seem to bridge no matter what he did or said.

  “It’s always all about you and I won’t be part of that again.” Lainey raised her chin as if daring him to object to what she stated.

  Taber studied her and wondered what could cause such pain, such anger that it ruled her.

  “Who is this man who hurt you so?” He took a step towards her.

  “Why should I tell you?”

  “So I can kill him.”

  “You can’t kill my dad.” Lainey blinked then continued, “You talk of murder in such a calm tone. You can’t just kill someone.”

  “If it is necessary I can.” Taber imagined doing just that to her father, although he didn’t know what the man had done to cause her such pain, making her so distrustful.

  “He’s not in my life anymore.” Lainey was watching him with a leery expression on her face.

  “I wouldn’t touch him without your permission. Family is sacred. Even when you want to kill them.”

  “I don’t even know you.”

  “You know me, Lainey. I’m the same man who you’ve always known.” Taber took another step towards her. “All these weeks you’ve been trying to push me away but you couldn’t. Think on why that is.”

  “I trusted my dad and he got my mother killed. His recklessness took her from me. He’s in jail for the rest of his life because of his part in her murder.” Lainey shook her head. “For years before everything happened he lied to me and Mom. Made promises that were false. Kept secrets that he thought it was best we not know.” Lainey lifted her narrowed eyes. “Sounds really familiar, doesn’t it, Taber? Or do you prefer Khonsu?”

  The bitterness and taunt was clear in her question.

  “You compare me to your father?” Taber demanded. “Think carefully about what you say next, Lainey. Is that what you believe of me?”

  Lainey opened her mouth then closed it. Taber advanced on her, moving into her space. She stood her ground, not giving any. The same way she had for weeks. Not giving him anything to even know if he could get past the wall she had erected against him. A wall he would damn well demolish now and each time she used it to keep him at bay. He’d been giving her time and space, wondering what to do. Lainey might have told him some truths about himself he hadn’t known. He would do the same to this stubborn woman who had his heart and soul.

  “You lash out at me for what someone else has done. Make all these statements about how you think I am. I’m not your father, Lainey, and I won’t be made to pay for what he did.” Taber stepped back, crossing his arms over his chest. “I’ll admit to not thinking how my not telling you about who I really was would hurt you. But it’s not for selfishness that I didn’t tell you. I didn’t know how to share what I am with you.” Taber opened his hands gesturing. “I couldn’t very well over breakfast after we’d fucked say. ‘Lainey, I’m a god. Please pass the butter. Or could I have told you when we were working say, ‘Oh, by the way I’m a god. Where is it you want that enclosure built?’ My being who I am”—he pounded his chest—“is not something that one can bring up in casual conversation. I know I should have told you, but I was trying to still figure out how. Hell I was trying to figure out what I cou—”

  He cut himself off before he revealed too much. Lainey moved close to him, putting her hand over his cartouche resting in his open necked shirt. It flared, making him jerk and blink. He finally realised why it kept burning his skin and feeling off lately. Lainey’s eyes widened but she didn’t pull away, instead she pressed firmer against the item with his true name.

  “What the hell is that?” she breathed out.

  The throatiness of her voice made him get even harder than he already was. It was always that way when he was around her. He felt unsettled in his skin and unsure of what he did with her.

  “It recognises you for what you are to me.”

  Taber sensed Chet and Allie coming towards them. There was no fear in the animals, just curiosity.

  “Welcome to the sanctuary. This is your new home. We’ll come to you for a more formal introduction at another time. My mate and I have some business to see to.”

  “Your what?” Lainey moved to withdraw.

  Taber held her hand in place and as deliberately as he had done when he had spoken with the animals, he let her hear what he said. “Rest now. I’ve got to get my mate home to our house.”

  Taber stared into
her shocked gaze and enfolded her body with his power as he took them away. As they faded, Lainey grabbed his shoulder with her other hand, her breathing harsh and erratic.

  “Calm, Lainey. I have you.”

  She stared at him then her Taber breathed with her, regulating then synching their breaths as they displaced in the air then came back to form in the living room of his home. Taber removed his hand from over hers on his cartouche.

  “I am the god Khonsu. I’m a traveller and have wandered this earth for many millenniums.” Taber inhaled deeply, taking in her scent that he could find no matter where she was. “I don’t stay one place too long, Lainey. But with you I would put down roots. Live wherever you choose.” He touched her cheek gently. “I am sometimes an asshole and don’t know it. I have been and probably will be selfish when it comes to any other man being around you. That I will not be able to control, since it’s in my nature.” Taber rubbed his finger over her lips. “I will not apologise for that Lainey. You’ll just have to accept it and”—Taber smiled—“let me know when I’m being a fool and call me on it.” He sobered. “I’m not like your fath—”

  She cut him off. “I know you’re not. It’s just…” She bit her lip.

  “Just what?” Taber smoothed his finger against it, removing the flesh gently from between her teeth.

  “I thought I’d dealt with what happened in my past.” She paused, inhaling. “Then finding out about you. Hell, all of you have been keeping something so huge from me. Lying to me opened a wound that had been closed.”

  “I didn’t mean to lie to you, I just couldn’t figure out how to tell the truth.”

  “I know. When you put it as you did referring to bringing up in casual conversation it made sense. Although I think the pass the butter one would have been funny.” Lainey smiled ruefully.

  “I did think about saying it over one of the numerous meals we’ve shared.” Taber chuckled then sobered. “Or any other numerous times. But I couldn’t figure out the best way to tell you and not have you react—”

  “Like a raving lunatic. Or make plans to have you committed for being crazy.”

  “There was that possibility, but I could get out of anything so I wasn’t worried about that.” Taber paused before he spoke again. “Although the knee to the groin was a bit much.”

  “Don’t forget the Mace.” Lainey laughed.

  “That, too. Who knew you were such a violent thing.” Taber rubbed his nose against hers.

  “You seem to bring it out in me.” Lainey wrinkled her nose. “I’ve been so angry at you.”

  “I can understand your issues with trust and lying. I can’t promise you won’t feel that way again, because it’s just not possible for me to say what I think of as not a lie in a way that you won’t feel it is lying. I can state now I know more about why you reacted the way you did I will try my best get through your damn wall and make you discuss what you are feeling with me.”

  “I did have a wall.” Lainey sighed. “I’ll try to listen more instead of getting defensive.”

  “Good. Because you have a mean knee.”

  Lainey laughed then cupped his erection through his jeans. “I’m sorry now about kneeing you.”

  “Now?” He cleared his throat.

  “Yes, now. You deserved it when I did it. But now I’m saying I’m sorry.”

  “That I can accept.” Taber lowered his head.

  Lainey averted her head from his kiss. She couldn’t kiss him or she’d never get what she needed to tell him out.

  How do I tell him about my dad?

  His lips pressed against the side of her face. “Okay. We’ll wait. For now, give me the short version about your father. Later we can discuss him more in depth.”

  Shocked she looked at him then narrowed her eyes. “Wait. Can you read my mind?”

  “Yes.” Taber looked unrepentant as he led her to the couch.

  “All this time you’ve been reading my mind?” she demanded.

  Taber sat pulling her against his larger frame before he spoke. “No, I haven’t. I respected your privacy but now it’s not possible. At least not yet.”

  “Why isn’t it possible now?”

  “I’ll tell you after you tell me about your father. Stop stalling.”

  Lainey conceded because she was indeed stalling. “My dad was a businessman with, let’s say, some less than legal dealings. We didn’t know about how he handled his business. One of his partners was unhappy with his upcoming divorce and he started talking with my dad about offing his wife. There wasn’t a clear idea of how it came about but somehow my dad agreed to kill his partner’s wife. Which he did, and his partner was really grateful.” Lainey blew out a breath. “My dad loved my mom but you know sometimes couples fight. Well my dad’s complaining to his partner about his fighting with my mom led to his business partner assuming he was hinting that he should return the favour and kill his wife. The partner did. It seemed like a car accident and we buried my mom. It wasn’t until my dad went back to work that the partner told him he killed her for him. Dad was devastated and proceeded to beat the man to death. The employees called the cops and they arrived before he could kill his partner. Dad admitted everything, including his own part in killing the man’s wife. The man lived and denied everything. But with the evidence they convicted him and he went to jail. He died during a prison riot.”

  She should feel sorry he had, but didn’t. If she could have been the one to kill him she would have done it herself. Taber hugged her close. Lainey rested against him and finished the story.

  “Dad’s in jail for the rest of his life. He writes me but I’ve never opened any of his letters. There is nothing to say.”

  “How old were you when this happened?”

  “Ten. Even though my foster mother didn’t want me to go, she took me every day of the trial for the man who murdered my mom. The last time I saw my father was when he testified during the proceedings.” Lainey shrugged.

  Taber’s grip tightened and he kissed the side of her face. “What do you do with the letters?”

  “I keep them in a box.” Lainey burrowed against him. “I should throw them out but…”

  “You can’t seem to.”

  Lainey didn’t reply to that instead said, “I don’t think of you as him. I know you’re not. I trust you but you can’t keep something so important about yourself from me, Taber.” She lifted her head and stared into his face. “Is there anything else you need to tell me?”

  “If I have to fill you in on my life it’ll take millenniums. I’ll share my life and travels with you over time.”

  Lainey gaped then demanded, “How old are you?”

  “Are you sure you want to know?” Taber grinned roguishly.

  Lainey thought about it then shook her head. Taber laughed and she joined him. A loud screech made her jump and look around frantically. Lainey stilled, staring in awe at the majestic bird perched on the tall stand in the corner. It cocked its head to the side and studied her from what seemed like intelligent black eyes.

  “Taber there is a hawk behind you,” Lainey whispered.

  “Klu can hear you Lainey. Hawks have great hearing.” Taber sounded amused.

  If she could take her gaze off the bird she would have smacked him upside the head. The bird lifted its wings and flew towards them. Lainey gasped, yanking away from Taber and stumbling back to fall on her butt on the floor between the couch and centre table. The hawk swooped down and landed on her knee. Lainey held still, not sure what to do. The hawk stared at her with that same intense stare as before, as if waiting for something.

  “What the hell do you want?” she whispered to the bird.

  “No need to whisper. Speak normal,” Taber said.

  Lainey glared at him over the hawk’s head. “Help me.”

  “He’s just saying hello. Klu this is Lainey. Lainey, Klu.”

  Lainey gazed at the bird. “Ummm…hi Clue. What kind of name is Clue?”

  “Not the clue
you mean. It’s spelt K-L-U,” Taber interjected.

  “Hush, I’m talking with your bird.” Lainey cocked her head to the side as she had seen it do. The bird mimicked her. “So, Klu. I’ve seen you before in Kali’s enclosure. I didn’t know you belonged to Taber.” She glanced at Taber then to the bird. “He’s a handful of trouble. Come on, tell me. I know he is.”

  A flood of images filled her mind. Lainey gasped and jerked. Klu lifted gracefully then resettled on her lap, watching her quizzically.

  “What the hell was that?”

  “He’s communicating with you.”

  “But how?” She glared at Taber. “It’s you. You gave me some sort of power thingy didn’t you?”

  “I didn’t.” He shrugged.

  “It’s the same reason the cartouche came to life when you touched it.”

  “What reason?”

  The hawk sent her more images, distracting her. Lainey gasped and laughed as she got a view of how Klu saw the world. It showed her Taber and some of his shenanigans.

  “See, I knew you were a troublemaker.”

  “That’s enough of that, Klu.” Taber gestured to the bird. “She’ll be around for you to rat me out, you traitor. Just remember who gives you shelter.”

  “I’ll take him home with me,” Lainey offered, enchanted by the bird.

  It moved closer and she noted its clawed feet didn’t hurt her at all. The bird gazed at her almost playfully then made a loud screech.

  “Stop flirting you old piece of shit.” Taber swatted at the bird.

  “Taber.” Lainey pushed at his hand.

  He gripped her hand and pulled her up, unseating Klu. Lainey inhaled sharply at his effortless strength. Taber grinned moving her into his lap.

  “He’s fine. We’ve been together for millenniums and he likes to mess with me.”

  “Wow, he’s that old.” Lainey watched Klu as he perched on the centre table.

  “Yes. He’s my travelling companion.”

  “So he’s immortal, too?”

  “Yes. I granted it to him after he wouldn’t leave me alone.” Taber glared at the bird.